Just for tonight
by Sano
Summary: After Hotohori discovers Tamahome in Miaka's room, he knows he has lost the battle for her love, and finds solace in a familiar presence. Yaoi, HotohorixNuriko


**Title: **Just for tonight

**Written by: **Sano

**Anime: **Fushigi Yuugi

**Couples: **HotohorixNuriko

**Disclaimer: **Yuu Watase still owns these bishies… but if I had my way… *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*

**Note: **This plot bunny has been nagging me for a while now, and I haven't written Fushigi Yuugi fics in AGES. I kinda missed this couple…

Please enjoy!

* * *

**Just for tonight**

Hotohori slammed the door to Miaka's chambers closed, his hands shaking so much the sword in his hand quivered in its sheath. He kept walking with no destination in mind, he had to get away, or else he might actually make good on his threat and chop off his fellow seishi's head.

Tamahome loved Miaka…

And Miaka loved Tamahome in return…

As for Hotohori… his heart had to be the one to get broken.

As a child he'd always been alone. His mother never allowed him to play outside with the other kids because it wasn't what the future emperor of Konan did.

Back then he often wished that he wasn't the future emperor…

So he hung on to the hope that the Priestess of Suzaku would finally be the one who would banish this life of loneliness.

It was as if his hopes and dreams were crashing down all around him.

Hotohori stopped walking and leaned against a pillar in defeat, clutching his crimson overcoat closer to his body to ward off the sudden chill, or was it the cloak of loneliness closing over him?

Hotohori had to talk to someone, or else he'd go crazy. He searched through his acquiantances for someone appropriate. Talking to his imperial advisers about heartbreak was definitely out of the question. He could almost imagine their wide-eyed astonishment and mouths dropping open at the idea of the Emperor of Konan being rejected for a lowly peasant.

No, they wouldn't suffice. He had to talk to someone his own age, but who?

Maybe he could talk to the other Suzaku Shichiseishi. Maybe he could seek advice from Chichiri? He was a bit older than the emperor so he could probably offer some advice. But he'd just met the older man a few hours ago, it would be unseemly to just go trudging to Chichiri for help in a personal matter…

So that left… Nuriko.

At the thought of the purple-haired seishi Hotohori felt uncomfortable. He wasn't deaf or blind so he knew that the other had some _feelings _for him. He wasn't so blinded by his love for Miaka that he hadn't noticed how Nuriko always worried over him.

During Miaka's absence, Nuriko had been a source of amusement and support. Always there to ask if there was anything he needed, pestering him to eat whenever he was too immersed in his work or too preoccupied with thoughts of Miaka. He couldn't very well talk about the girl he loved with someone who harbored some feelings for him. That would be rude.

But… Nuriko always said to come to him whenever he needed help, didn't he?

Being the Emperor of Konan, he always had to make sacrifices for his country. He had to sacrifice his youth, his time, and now, even his love was taken away because of his duties… So for tonight, he decided to be selfish. For tonight, he would do what _he _wanted.

Walking briskly to the kitchen, he was relieved to find it empty for the night. Grabbing a bottle of sake off the table, he uncorked the top and took a long swig. The expensive sake burned pleasantly on the way down and numbed his senses; it even helped a little to dull the ache in his heart.

Hotohori didn't drink much, only a glass of wine now and then in political meetings, or a customary toast in parties. So he wasn't that used to sake. But for now it was what he wanted, so he was going to drink as much as he liked!

Dropping his sword on the marble floor, he grabbed a couple more bottles and walked out with a destination in mind.

* * *

Fresh from a warm bath, Nuriko ran a comb through his newly-washed hair, working out the knots and kinks. He quickly donned fresh undergarments and padded over to the vanity table and checked out his reflection in the mirror.

Yep, still beautiful, almost too beautiful that it masked the immense sadness he felt. Plopping down on a cushioned chair, he continued yanking the comb through his hair. The beautiful face staring back at him filled with mockery and self-loathing.

Since Kourin's death, his mind was set on living for her, _being _her. And he wanted the best for his sister. He excelled in school and practiced all the intricacies of being a lady, knowing that his sister would've excelled in the same attributes as well. He grew out his hair and wore fashionable clothes to reach his ultimate goal: to be part of the Imperial harem.

At last he'd arrived at his destination. He knew that a lady of the court's purpose was to be there for the Emperor, provide entertainment or solace whenever it was needed. In return, he was given everything that a lady needed, the best clothes, the finest jewelry, carriages and a wonderful room in the palace…

But the last thing he expected was to fall in love with the Emperor himself.

Not only was the Emperor Hotohori intelligent and beautiful, but he had the strength to carry the country's burden on his shoulders without any complaint, and at a young age too. At first it was admiration, but when he glimpsed the loneliness that uncannily mirrored his own in the other man's eyes, Nuriko knew he was a goner.

He thought that he would be the one to banish the loneliness, but now…

It was too bad that Miaka was an endearing girl, or he would've really hated her having Hotohori-sama's love.

A knock at the door pulled him from his thoughts and he suddenly noticed his undressed state. The knocks grew louder and he called out, "I'm coming!" before pulling on a white dressing robe.

Nuriko clutched the edges of the robes closed over his chest tightly and opened the door before asking who it was, and promptly embarrassed himself when his jaw dropped at the sight of the person on his doorstep.

"Hotohori-sama!"

* * *

A warm, fuzzy feeling came over him as Hotohori heard the other man speak his name in a voice breathy with surprise. "Konbanwa, Nuriko. Can we talk?" He lifted the sake bottle in his hand and took another swallow. He smirked slightly when Nuriko's violet eyes widened at the sight of the bottle.

"O-of course, Hotohori-sama. P-please come in!" The violet-haired seishi was definitely flustered at his presence. For some reason, that pleased him. Nuriko stepped aside and he walked into the room, but the liquor had apparently reached his head and so he staggered clumsily.

Soft, feminine arms went around his shoulders to support him and a melodious voice stated the obvious. "Hotohori-sama, you're drunk."

He was led to a chair and he slumped into it. "No, I'm not." He protested indignantly.

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are!"

"I'm not drunk. I'm just… relaxed."

Nuriko folded his arms over his chest and regarded him curiously. "If you're not drunk then I'll gladly eat Suzaku for dinner." It was certainly a rare thing to see the Emperor in an intoxicated state, his face flushed from sake and his long, glorious hair disheveled.

He was further surprised when Hotohori threw back his head and laughed whole-heartedly at the joke. "Then you'd probably inform the kitchen staff then, because I'm not drunk!" The smile he wore reached his eyes and Nuriko thought it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

Sighing in defeat, Nuriko acquiesced to the other man's claim. "Fine, you're not. So… would you mind telling me why you've been drinking?" Suddenly, the smile vanished from Hotohori's face and was replaced with anguish.

Suddenly regretting uttering the wuestion, he started to stammer, "Hotohori-sama, I'm sorry for impo-"

"Miaka loves Tamahome." Those three words couldn't have been uttered with such misery and Nuriko winced in sympathy. Hotohori tugged on his hair as he drank the sake. "I guess I was so blinded by my love for Miaka to see that Tamahome was in love with her too… I should've gone to search for her… I should've paid more attention… I should've…" He trailed off meekly and buried his face in his hands.

Nuriko was at a loss on how to respond, and instead went to sit on the chair beside the emperor and rubbed his back soothingly. "I'm sorry, Hotohori-sama… but what has happened… can't change."

The emperor raised misty eyes and Nuriko's heart ached at the pain reflected in them. "Nuriko… it hurts… so much!"

"I know it hurts, but you have to get through this. Maybe Miaka wasn't meant for you, someone is out there, who'll love you for who you are and will be by your side always, all you can do now is wait. Any girl would be crazy not to fall in love with you." He brushed back Hotohori's hair from his face and looked him in the eyes. "You're the emperor of this country, and the people need you. I know it hurts now, but the pain will disappear in time… You have to be strong, and I'll always be here to help."

Hotohori searched Nuriko's eyes for any uncertainty or even pity, but he saw none, he only saw unwavering support and unconditional love reflected in the pools of violet. His eyes dropped down to Nuriko's lips, and was surprised at the almost uncontrollable urge to touch them with his own.

Troubled by the uncharacteristic and tempting thought, he raised the sake bottle to his lips again, but the bottle was plucked out of his hands with ease.

"Oh, no, you don't!" He stretched the bottle out of the emperor's reach. It was a testament to how drunk he was that Hotohori didn't even try to make an effort to challenge him. Nuriko smiled in triumph and patted the brown-haired seishi on the head. "Now, be a good boy and wait here while I change. I'll brew us some tea so that we can talk, alright?" Hearing no response from his companion, his eyes heavy-lidded with intoxication, he traipsed into the bedroom to change into some decent clothes.

Nuriko went to the bed where he'd lain out his clothes earlier and reached for his trousers. He was in the process of undoing the belt on his robe when suddenly, strong arms went around him and pulled him back into a warm body, and froze.

"Nuriko…" Hotohori whispered into the other seishi's shocked ear, his mouth already ghosting over the smaller man's neck. He was drugged by Nuriko's scent, not marred by any perfume… its smell was incredibly enthralling. He could remember the many days that he was stuck in his office poring over documents, and Nuriko would waltz in with a tray of tea and sweet buns, it was this same scent that brought a breath of fresh air into his otherwise dull life.

Nuriko gasped as Hotohori found a particularly sensitive cluster of nerves on the side of his neck and almost jumped when he touched it with the tip of his tongue. "H-Hotohori-sama…" He breathed softly. This wasn't happening; never in a hundred years would he imagine the Emperor of Konan to behave this way.

Of course he'd imagined what it was like to be held by the brown-haired seishi, dreamed of it actually. And if he was dreaming, oh dear Suzaku, please don't ever let him wake up.

He cocked his head to the side, exposing the column of his neck more fully. Hotohori groaned softly at his sign of surrender and dropped his hands to Nuriko's on the belt of his robe, untying the silk clumsily.

It felt as if a bucket of freezing water was dumped on Nuriko's head as he stared at the emperor's drunken clumsiness. He was drunk… that's why he was doing this…

And he just got his heart broken… and Nuriko was the substitute.

Nuriko didn't want to be a substitute.

Hotohori had finally managed to untie the belt and was pushing the robe from Nuriko's shoulders when hands gripped his tightly. "Please stop it, Hotohori-sama." Nuriko spoke with as much force as he could manage and turned around, still gripping his wrists, when all he wanted to do was kiss the other man senseless, but this wasn't right.

"But Nuriko…" The voice was pleading, alluring… and it was a tone that he had never heard the dignified emperor use. It was searing in its intimacy. His grip on the other's wrists weakened for a moment and Hotohori used this as an opportunity to seize Nuriko's lips with his own and pushed him down on the bed.

Nuriko refused to respond, he can't! He waited to see how far Hotohori would let this go on, and when he would get the point and let go. Then they would straighten things out and tomorrow they'd act as if nothing happened.

But as always, it was easier said than done, it took all of his sanity to not notice how the love of his life was on top of him and kissing him as if he was the only source of oxygen on earth.

Hotohori was unfazed by the lack of response and proceeded to kiss all around his face and neck. "Nuriko… I want you so much…" The desire was almost blinding, he'd never felt anything like this in his entire life… he wanted more, he wanted all of what this beautiful creature offered. His hands trailed over Nuriko's body, feeling the soft yet lean contours, eliciting a moan of pleasure from Nuriko.

Somehow, Nuriko found the strength to stop Hotohori's hand from traveling lower. He grasped the other's face and leveled it with his own. "This has to stop, Hotohori-sama. You're drunk right now, and you're not yourself. You don't want this."

Hotohori's eyes flashed with passion as he spoke. "You're wrong, I want this… and I know you want me too."

Nuriko almost laughed at the appalling truth in those words. He wanted Hotohori-sama more than the power of the Four Gods combined. He'd give anything just to hear those words, but not in these circumstances. He was ready to use all of his strength to throw the emperor off, if need be, but his next words took his breath away.

"Please Nuriko… just for tonight… take the loneliness away…"

To be the one to take the pain and loneliness from Hotohori's eyes… it was like Suzaku had given him wings.

For one night, this man would be his. For one night, he would be what Hotohori-sama wanted… not Miaka, but him.

Nuriko gently caressed Hotohori's cheeks, and wiped away the errant tears from his eyes. Hotohori-sama was his… this one night would last him for all eternity, it was more than he could ever dream of.

"Hai, Hotohori-sama…" Hotohori released the breath he hadn't known he was holding and seized the other's lips with renewed fervor. Nuriko threw all cares aside and threw himself wholeheartedly into the kiss.

For one night, neither of them would be lonely.

*^^*

Nuriko whistled to himself as he walked through the imperial gardens. In a little while, the Suzaku Shichiseishi would gather to map out their plans in searching for the other three warriors while Tamahome was in Kutou.

Although the move was impulsive, Nuriko commended Tamahome for his courage and loyalty to his country, if not for him, Konan would be run over by Kutou soldiers by now.

He caught sight of Miaka on his way to the meeting to be held in the Emperor's office, her face forlorn. "Hey there, Miaka… why the long face? Come and let's meet with Chichiri and Hotohori-sama, then we'll raid the kitchen for something to eat." The girl nodded in agreement and he felt sad for her. He wound his arms through hers and pulled her towards their meeting.

"Ohayo no da!" Chichiri greeted them as they entered the room. Both murmured their greetings and Nuriko proceeded to plop down on a chair. Another person walked into the room and Nuriko lifted his eyes to that of Emperor Hotohori's, his breath caught as they stared at each other.

Last night after they had made love, Nuriko was surprised at the emperor's preference to stay till morning, when he had expected him to just get up and leave. All night they held each other, content with the silence until fatigue had claimed them. It was by far the most fulfilling night of sleep that both had ever had. Then at the crack of dawn, Hotohori had dressed and left, it would be unsightly for the other concubines to see him leaving his room at broad daylight. Nuriko was asleep when he left, but he swore that he felt the emperor kiss him once on the lips once before leaving.

"Good morning, Nuriko." Hotohori greeted him warmly. Nuriko seized on the conversational bit and greeted him in return.

"Good morning, Hotohori-sama."

Hotohori nodded and proceeded to a chair on the head of the table. Chichiri took it as a signal to begin and so he began to recite various routes they could take in their search. Nuriko only had one ear to the smiling seishi, he snuck a look at the Emperor and found the other man staring at him. He blushed furiously and looked down at his lap.

The emperor didn't seem bothered by his reaction and made a suggestion to Chichiri, and the planning went on.

Although it was a short glance, Nuriko was surprised that something about the emperor had changed. He glanced at him again and was sure of what he saw.

Hotohori's eyes seemed… lighter, devoid of the hurt and loneliness of the night before. The thought lifted the corners of his mouth into a smile. Because of what happened, even for a little while… the emperor seemed… happy.

Nuriko raised his eyes and met those of Hotohori's. He smiled warmly at him, and was rewarded with an enchanting smile from the emperor.

Yes, he was definitely happy.

And that was enough.

THE END

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